Tag Archives: Real Housewives of New York City

Kelly Bensimon and her weird breast implants scheduled for Playboy

In the wackiest entertainment news this week, Real Housewives of New York star Kelly Bensimon announced that she was going to be in December Playboy. Kelly is known for her wonky breast implants which seem to have a mind of their own as seen below. Watch Real Housewives of New York online!

I am Kelly Bensimon and I am so awesome
I am Kelly Bensimon and I am so awesome

This is what Kelly will be showing off in Playboy.

I'm at Sandals because I can't afford St Barts anymore
I'm at Sandals because I can't afford St Barts anymore

The reaction online has not been kind to say the least.

I don’t know what’s going on between the two pieces of her bikini, but it ain’t right. And I fear it is going to give me the bad dreams.

Meh face? Check.
Awful plastic tits? Check.
Thick waist? Check.
“Hips” same width as waist? Check.

I’m missing why this is such a travesty: this is what Playboy’s been crapping out since the ’90s. The only difference is that this one is lumpier than most of the others pre-Photoshop.

She has the torso of an grizzled old truck driver.

Ok I’m not a man, but are there guys out there who honestly want to see this messed-up body? The world must have spun off its axis if this shit is for real.

That is a man-abdomen if I’ve ever seen one. The muscular thick around the middle is about as unattractive as the fat thick around the middle.

No wonder Playboy is circling the drain.